Hatred Toward the Opposite Sex and Trauma?
I am a straight male and there is an annoying phenomenon I wish to hear your opinions on.
Dr. Susan Forward (may she rest in peace) who specializes in trauma wrote several books, which I have been enjoying reading lately. Her books shed light on why some people have an unconscious hatred towards the opposite sex. Books like:
Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them
Toxic Parents
Betrayal of Innocence: Incest and Its Devastation
They discuss the impact parents have on forming our mate selection criteria and perception of the opposite sex. Because a care giver present us with the first imprission we have on members of the caregiver's gender, we may go for the same traits or the opposite of them. For single parents they also project how they feel about the opposite sex and we carry that perception with us in life.
A man whose father transfered his mistrust of women onto him selects women who are highly dependent. A woman with an abusive parent always go for toxic drama filled relationships with men. Regardless of the upbringing scenario, according to Dr. Forward, people go for "familiar" when searching for a partner. And because the past has never been dealt with, these traumatized individuals remain stuck in a vicious cycle of meeting the wrong people. And even if they meet the right people, they just don't feel comfortable enough to stay because real safe love is just unfamiliar.
I think that because everytime they meet people from opposite sex who confirm their upbrigning bias, they eventually declare that the opposite sex is bad and untrustworthy.
Do you agree that this is why there are people who say "all women are..." or "all men are..."? Or do you think there are other reasons for the phenomenon?