Submission is scary

I feel like this is a point that doesn't get acknowledged often when discussing submission. Many women react out of fear when the topic is discussed. Many have been abused physically and sexually. Submission places you in a position of extreme vulnerability, so yes women feel scared and unsafe with it. It requires great faith in God to submit yourself to a fallen human, especially when you already know what it feels like to be taken advantage off.

My first husband tried to murder me. That created a lot of trust issues and the idea of submitting to a husband felt like a death sentence after that. Fortunately, my husband now I have known for a long time and he is a very gentle and godly man so it has really helped me, along with my faith in God. I don't think I could submit to anyone else but him because he is one of the few men I truly trust.

My advice to unmarried women is only marry a man you wouldn't be afraid to submit to. If you can feel at peace trusting him with your care and safety, then he is probably the man for you. If you have any doubt that you would feel safe submitting to him, then take that as your sign he is not the right man for you

Fortunately, God recognizes our vulnerable position and provides protection for us. The husband who mistreats his wife will have his prayers hindered. What a terrifying thought to have your prayers ignored by God. Your father cares for you and will protect you. I know first hand it can feel terrifying to submit to someone But that is why submission is based on trust in our father in heaven who will protect just as he did Abigail in the OT. It requires faith in his goodness and trust in his care not your husband's.

1 Peter 3:4–7 (ESV): but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. 7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.